Smelly mee?

I was just pushing up the last of the three roller shutters in front of my retail pharmacy when from the corner of my eye I saw my loyal customer Mr Cheong, a gambling junkie, hurrying towards me.

I turned to him and beamed my best smile of the day at him

Good Morning Uncle Cheong! So how were the results last night? Won big again eh?

Shhh! You don't have to trumpet everything to the whole town, right! No lah... just small sum only. Enough to go on a trip to China with my missus only. But come, Ah Lim, I need to ask you something..

I led him pass the glass entrance, switched on the lights and the air conditioning. I invited him to take a seat by the consultation table and blurted out, out of habit ,my usual greeting to all my customers.

So how may I be of service to you...

Ah Lim, I know you all these years, you're still so formal. You'll never change. I want to ask you if you smell me or not.

Puzzled at why he should ask such a question that is totally out of context, I questioned him hesitantly..

What ...mee? Mee goreng ...or hokkien mee?

He looked cross

What? You are trying to be funny is it? Want to be a clown, go join a circus! I asked you properly if you can smell any bad smell from me or not, you make fun and talk about mee goreng..

I could almost feel the acid in my stomach burning its way up my gullet...Damn! What a blunder! I thought to myself, then putting on my most contrite face I quickly apologised.

Uncle Cheong, I really am sorry, I didn't know what you were talking about..

Hoping to redeem myself, I quickly dove into the subject matter..

Ok.. regarding your concern about your body odour.. is there any particular reason why you brought this up?

He gave an embarrassed smile

Last night while I was getting ready to sleep, my wife asked me to get a bath because she say I stink. I just took my bath less than 2 hours ago and she say I stink. I don't smell anything but to please her, I went to have another shower... Today I need to meet a few important business clients. I dont want to go there and spoil my chances of getting the deal just because they can smell me..

Suppressing a grin, I told him

Uncle Cheong, it is usual for us not to detect our own body odour unless it is quite strong and by that time, others around us would have gotten a good dose of the smell. Today, so far, I do not detect any odour from you,honestly. But I would...

Ok. good...

He interrupted

I've got to go for my meeting now.. I'll come back at lunch time and you can tell me how to get rid of my problem for good...

He whizzed out and disappeared before I could tell him to calm down so he wouldn't perspire so much and wish him luck in his business deal.